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This is something I wrote a few years ago to my eldest son Jai for his 21st coming of age party ... I couldn't be with him on the night as I was living on the Sunshine Coast in QLD. Jai was attending The Academy of Performing Arts in Ballarat, Victoria. This was read out at his party which was held in Melbourne.

You can read the full article with photos here: http://www.gather.com/viewArticle.jsp?articleId=281474977376727 .. or read on ..


'''‘The gift you gave me’
To my much loved son Jai

I am sending these thoughts, feelings and reflections to you with all my love.
Although I could not be there tonight with you in the physical sense, I am with you tonight as always ……….. in spirit.

Let me try to describe the gift you have given to me,
It will be a major task, since it is difficult to describe in just a few words.
I will try my best.

Your arrival 21 years ago was marked with anxiety and apprehension.
The journey you were about to embark on, was not one of which had been planned, but was without a doubt ‘meant to be’.
By far, the finest creative gift I could have ever have dreamed of … was you.
For when you came into my world, it was the start of a new and marvelous journey. I felt as though I was experiencing for the very first time in my life, the strength of the emotion we call ‘love’.

With my heart so willing to share it’s wealth.
There you were, a small wonder; a tiny reflection of combined characteristics which would ultimately be recreated into the distinctively unique person you have become today.
I never realized that my heart was so willing to share so much love with a stranger so small and needy.

You didn't arrive with instructions. It was strictly learn as you go, as I discovered only a few days after you came home from hospital.

I remember bathing you, I turned you ever so carefully over, onto my arm so I could wash your back. I couldn’t see your face, but I could hear your gurgling and you were splashing about having a most wonderful time, or so I thought …….. until I turned you back over, only to find you gasping for air and your little face covered with water.
As I said …….. it was trial and error and lot of tears on my part.

As time went by you started crawling around on your belly for the longest time.
You walked with support for many months, but when it came to taking those first steps, so unexpectedly… you did it all by yourself.
From then on there was no stopping you.
You had a strong and determined disposition, along with that smile that makes my heart sing, still to this day.

At the age of 3 your little brother was on the way, and you became the special big brother that you have turned out to be.
Sharing and loving was not something you needed to learn.
Even at that young and tender age ……. You became the teacher.
Ever so patient …….. So caring ……… So you.
A family trait that you will certainly pass on.

I offered you the tools to learn and trust and to be a confident person.

You showed me that you can be an independent person.
The day you went to school for the first time, you looked so small, yet so ready to embark upon a new venture.
You ran to the classroom, and so did those tears in my eyes, not because I was sad but because a new chapter in your life was beginning.

As you grew, you obtained a wonderful gift of laughter.
You are an intelligent, sensible, affectionate and sympathetic person, who always seems to be there for those whose lives you touch.

When you were 7 years old, our family of four became three. You were determined to be the little man of the house, helping to nurture your little brother Beau, and always being so protective of him, and me.

The next 7 or 8 years weren’t easy for us financially or materialistically, but we had an abundance of love and laughter we shared between the three of us.
You grew so amazingly perceptive and insightful for one of so few years during this time.

You have an extraordinary enthusiasm and passion for life and learning, and also an ability to communicate your inner most thoughts, where so many your age do not.

I am blessed for that, as too, is humanity in these difficult and unpredictable times in the world of today.

Now, you are coming of age into adulthood, making decisions that you may not be able to pass by me which will affect your life.
You may fall down……….
……….but I know you will always pick yourself up, begin again and triumph over all complexities set before you.


I never thought that I would be in awe of someone your age, but it has become evident, as you look at us side by side; the bond can never be broken.


The stranger that entered my life not so long ago, has certainly been transformed into a extraordinarily amazing young man.

A man ……… I am so very, very proud to call . . .
My son.

Thankyou for the unique and irreplaceable gift you have given me… …………… YOU.


All my love as always for evermore.
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